I’m not safe anywhere
no one knows the gravity
pavement is the lowest they’ll go
stale atmosphere in the kitchen.
we only get along enough to pass the cutting board-
I hate you. I loathe you
stop projecting your guilt onto us
you’re a grandfather 15 years too late
it shows in your hair
I saw a recent photograph of my grandmother
it’s lying on the fridge right now.
a dusty rosary
an unfinished crossword puzzle
a silent apartment
no Sunday phone calls
a childhood’s end
PLEASE DON’T LEAVE
I’ll do anything
I’m desperate, no dignity
you must stay
I yearn to ask
if you still love her
if I’m second best
if you’re certain
how can I fill your void
If I can’t fill my own?
Grandmother, a bowl of my favorite soup, please
you were my first
everyone is leaving
but you’re the one I can’t let go
“they would run. if someone got hurt, or jumped,
they would run.”
“he’s soooo beta”
“In person. That’s where it’s at.
Imagine: I’m walking across the Sahara,
and I run into you, you attract my attention instantly.
We connect for that brief moment in time, and then we part ways.
5 years later, I am strolling through a crowded street in Italy.
The moment is blurred as I pick your face out of the crowd, I notice you before anybody.
The intensity of that moment is incomparable
to sending some shitty text to you.
I prefer that.”
“I will create as I speak”
“Perish with the word”
peanut butter vibes
“If I were rich, I’d be an alcoholic.”
“tell me something more beautiful”
I don’t want to be your girlfriend
I just want to take your picture.
I’m just a doll
feed me, I’m pretty
“You can tell me to shut up, you know”
“…but if you stop talking, I’ll stop laughing.”
(suddenly, without warning):
“you’re one of a kind.”
“This is a relationship. I mean, it is something.”
I can Houdini myself out of any situation.
or so I think.
I think I can escape the weight.
Mother, thank you for taking my burdens
all this time
but I can no longer lay them on you
I’ll be the mother figure now
adorn me with flowers.
I can understand why
you couldn’t bear to face the woman in the supermarket
who wore my perfume
we started out sweet like wind chimes and spring rain
then ended up lurid like Hannibal and Clarice
you were my favorite friend
but I’ll never love the likes of you again
I’m finally aware of the other daughters.
I don’t envy them,
but you’ve made me detest their presence.
You call her pet names I’ve never heard,
and that’s alright.
But you’ve got some nerve
shoving her feet between my stride.
Piss off, “sister”.
“Am I cool?”
I guess I’m not 17 anymore.
wearing my middle school perfume
I don’t fall in love fast like before
or at all.
except for that Olympus OM-2 I just snagged on Ebay
she’s a beaut.
And now I can take more pictures of things that don’t remind me of you
heard you got a new girlfriend.
got you off my back,
got you off my blade.
I heard you renewed your twitter.
you’re a fucking reptile.
go tweet about that.
Is that true love?
I’ll just watch from here, thanks.
Press my face up against the window.
Is that your soulmate?
I like my solitude too much to participate
Maybe next round.
I’ll leave fragments of myself in their parlors and on their doorsteps
until my Wesley Crusher comes around.
But I’m in no hurry. I’m still a sap for it, but I don’t need to cave.
“Tornado Warning in this
area til 2:30 AM CDT.
Take shelter now.”
Give me that Shakespearean love.